The Definition of Marriage

I was asked today why we can’t just call gay marriage something else and provide the same benefits to a Civil Union or Domestic Partnership. The person I was speaking with believes that this would be a good compromise as the national debate about gay marriage really is a debate about the definition of marriage, I disagree that the definition is actually what is at the core of the debate and other than the simple fact that “separate but equal” has already been proven to be an unsuccessful way to go about things I whole heartedly disagree with just changing the name of it for the LGBT community.
I honestly don’t ‘understand why it is an issue at all – in a religious setting gay couples will still not be able to get married; your church, your pastor, preacher, rabbi or imam will not perform this marriage and it will not be made in the eyes of your God so there is no insult to anyone’s religion and no one is being forced to recognize their marriage religiously at all. In fact by using a religious based argument against gay marriage you are also saying that anyone who is not of the same faith as you should have their marriage denied – as in atheists and agnostics and pagans should not be allowed to call it marriage either as marriage is a holy union between one man and one woman in the eyes of the Lord. Also if it is faith based then there should be no laws supporting or denying any marriage at all due to the separation of church and state – if this is a faith based situation only then the law should never be involved at all and we should gain no benefits, tax breaks or any other such legal results from it.
Beyond that, it will not affect anyone else’s marriage except the couple actually getting married. I am floored regularly how people can care so much and actively try to prevent something that does not affect their personal lives in any way. John and Joe being able to get married would not change the meaning of my own marriage, it would not make it anything less, it would not affect how religious or non-religious our marriage is, it would not make us love each other less and it would not make marriage mean anything different to me in my life. I am amazed that people can hate so much, that people are able to waste so much energy and effort to stop something that should not matter to them at all. Your marriage is yours alone and does not belong to the public; how you choose to get married and who you marry should not be a concern of the nation’s or your neighbors. I understand laws that are put into place in regards to minimum age for marriage but I will never be able to wrap my head around why people care if Sally and Sue call each other wife.
As for the benefits gained legally from marriage; if that is someone’s reason for continuing to deny gay marriage that is just mean and cold hearted and so very very un-Christian. How mean do you have to be to tell someone that they can’t visit a loved one in critical care in the hospital? How awful of a human being do you have to be to actively prevent someone from filing their taxes joint or sharing a mortgage or claiming a dependent on their insurance? Seriously, that is effed up for anyone to care THAT much about the way a stranger lives their life.

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